Saturday, February 7, 2009

diary entry:distressed and emotional.

lately ive been feeliing a bit emotionally unstable. there are just some things in my life that i really wish very different, or i wish some things had never changed. people say that time heals the pain, is that is most cases? or is that a fact? i dont believe it is . time hasnt healed anything , but it has made things worse. so i am now trying to figure out how to make ammends to thingss that were so valuable to my life. although i am struggling i tend to stay strong. but day by day i am also getting a bit weaker because then i realize that MORE time has past and that nothing that i am doing is helping the situation. i really hate haveing to TRY to trust someone or even try to make things right with someone. it seems like no matter how hard i try, my plans keep failing.and when this happens my heart gets weaker.but regaurdless of it all i still try.something keeps telling me to keep on trying no matter what. im drivin crazy everytime i think about this issue and i wonder why it turned out this way and maybe things do happen for a reason, but then again i feel that if this happened for a reason , it was to test the strengths and weaknesses of that person. i just think to myself, if only the guard was to be let down , then i would be able to really be at one with my emotions. there would be nothing holding me back. but i just wish that the day comes soon , when it all is clear to everyone what god had planned for us. :D

i know you dont have any idea of what im tlkin aout but this was just like a diary entry,,so yeaaaaa

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